How to Help Your Alcoholic Spouse

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Alcoholism is a disease that affects the entire family. Often, spouses of alcoholics feel isolated and alone. They don’t know how to reach out to their loved one or how to motivate them to get the help they need.

In the end, we all know that an alcoholic cannot recover if he or she is not willing to take those first steps. However, we also know that recovery is more likely with a strong and healthy support system.


Just as honesty is the first step in battling alcoholism; it is also the first step in helping alcoholics realize that they have problems. Loved ones often try to hide the truth from themselves and others. This denial can only cause the problem to become more severe. A spouse must face the facts that alcoholism is a life-altering disease that can be confronted and overcome.


The fact that alcoholism is a true disease is difficult to understand for those who are not affected by it. Addicts crave the substance they are addicted to just as others crave air or water. Most alcoholics want to stop, but many do not know how.

One of the most important things that spouses must remember is to recognize the disease without blaming the alcoholic him- or herself. When faced with alcoholism, laying blame is rarely effective and can only add more stress to the marriage.


Both the alcoholic and his or her family need professional counseling in order to cope with and overcome the disease. However, many alcoholics are reluctant to enter into counseling.

Even once they are able to admit that they have a problem, they often believe that they can stop drinking on their own without outside intervention. This is seldom a successful venture. Spouses can help by remaining calm and sharing information about the benefits of counseling.

Gather statistics about success rates of counseling. Be prepared to answer any questions that come up, such as the cost of counseling, whether insurance covers the fees, and what kind of time commitment the family can expect.

Life Goes On

Spouses of alcoholics often feel as though their lives are meant only to serve the well-being of the sufferer. As a spouse, one must realize that the marriage cannot be healthy if both members are completely encompassed by the alcoholism. Spouses should take time for themselves to enjoy life outside of alcohol and treatments.

Some find that doing things together, like taking classes or enjoying sports, are an excellent way to reconnect. Others believe that time apart is healthier for their relationship. One or two evenings each week can be devoted to getting a massage or working out. If possible, trying to spend time together and apart can be greatly beneficial.

In the end, it is true that the alcoholic cannot receive help until he or she is ready. Meanwhile, it is vital for spouses of alcoholics to remember that they are not to blame for this terrible disease.

They need to be there for their significant other, offering support and encouragement, but they also need to be there for themselves. While it can feel like an unfortunate burden, it is often up to the healthy party in the relationship to provide the stability needed to keep the marriage strong.

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Quit Drinking Alcohol Tips

Alcohol addicted


If you are trying to quit drinking alcohol, it is best to slowly wean off if possible. In doing so, you will learn to live without it on a daily or regular basis and it is going to make it easier for you to stop drinking in general.

Below are a few simple tips that can help you cut back slowly and eventually stop completely if you are trying to quit drinking on a regular basis.

Set the goal -

The very first thing you have to do is set the goal to quit drinking alcohol. You want to set a date to quit by, set boundaries up (if you can drink during holidays or festivities, or if you are trying to quit completely), give yourself reasons why you should quit. By doing this you are going to see the end goal. When you set goals, you are more likely to follow through, rather than quit halfway through.

Have the right support -

Whether you need professional help and choose AA or other similar support groups or whether you simply build your own support system with family and friends, you need to surround yourself with people who are there for you and want to help you.

If you have support, it is going to be much easier to contain yourself when you feel like giving up and it is going to keep you on course for the longer haul. It will prevent you from falling off the wagon halfway through, and even after you quit; so, build a strong network, and always have people around you that want to see you succeed, and are going to help you push along.

Set smaller breaks -

When trying to quit drinking alcohol, rather than cut it out of your life all of a sudden, do so in smaller chunks. When you just start, tell yourself you won’t drink a couple days out of the week (of course this all depends on how often you drink to begin with).

Once this becomes easy for you to do, add on another day for the following weeks. By taking it in strides and smaller steps you will not only reach your goal dates, you will also find it much easier to cut it out of your life for the long run. If you try to quit cold turkey, this is just like any other addiction, you might start drinking again only a short time after you quit. However, if you take slower and smaller steps it is going to be much easier to eliminate the alcohol for good.

Remove the temptations

If you go out to clubs, parties, and bars often, it is going to be extremely difficult to quit drinking alcohol; additionally, if you have beer and wine at home, host parties often and keep liquor in the home, it is going to be nearly impossible to avoid and ignore it.

So, get the sources away from you, limit social interactions where you will be tempted and make it easier for you to see progress rather than continual failure. You don’t have to do this all at once, but again, you want to get out of harm’s way, and get the temptations out of your way.

Have faith in yourself -

Just like any other addiction, from quitting drugs, to trying to lose weight, or any other difficulties in your life, you are going to slip up and move backwards at times. The key is to get back on track, rather than allow this one minor setback become something major.

You have to avoid calling yourself a failure and have to allow for error. Especially if you have been drinking heavily for many years in your life, it is bound to happen that you will mess up; the thing to remember is to get back on track right away and avoid continual setbacks.

These simple quit drinking alcohol tips are things anyone can do and will help you quit completely. At the very least cut back to a social amount of drinking, rather than drinking on a daily basis.

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Alcohol Rehabilitation – 5 keys to regain your sobriety

If you have drug problems, have abused, or are undergoing alcohol rehabilitation, in order to get clean, there are several things you can do, that will contribute to helping you get clean. Alcoholism is a disease, and in each case it is a bit different; you have to find things that work for you, and help you get through the abusive nature you have created. These are some suggestions, to work in with a rehab program that will help you get clean, and stop abusing alcohol.

Exercise – 
Working out on a regular basis is going to have a great deal of impact on your rehabilitation course. A healthy lifestyle can go a long way to helping you stop using alcohol. A routine and healthy lifestyle is going to contribute to changing other aspects of your life; in fact, there are sobriety programs built around the idea of exercise alone. Making it a habit and making it a part of your lifestyle, is going to help you stop drinking, and help you make other positive lifestyle changes along the way.

Structural changes – 
You have to make major structural changes in your lifestyle, and the way you are living as well. Recovery and getting past an addiction is all about the ability to change; with changing major aspects of your life, you are helping break an addictive cycle, and helping you get off your addictive path.

From things as simple as changing your daily routine, or where you work, to major changes like living situation or relationships. You have to commit to change, since you are trying to change bad habits you have developed, which have led to addiction.

Help others – 
If you are helping others, you are helping yourself. By working with others in rehab, working as a mentor or someone they can talk to, and learning simple things that are part of recovery (12 steps, etc), you are going to be self-recovering, as well as helping those who are on the same destructive path as you.

When you focus your energy on doing good and helping other people, it is going to go a long way in helping you get clean, and helping you to make the changes that you are trying to make in your life, when you are trying to get clean, and want to live a life without the dependency of drugs and on alcohol.

Take lessons you have learned – 
One aspect of recovery is to look at bad situations and negatives from your past, and finding the good, or the lessons you have learned from the past. By being able to see what alcohol has done to you, relationships, your life, and other aspects of it, you are going to see how it has harmed you in the past.

But, when you look at this problem, you also have to look at the potential for growth, and a positive that has come out of the situation. By learning how to look at negatives, and extract some kind of lesson you have learned from it, you are going to be able to grow, make the right changes, and make the jumps and transitions moving forward a little bit easier for you to deal with.

Make you a priority – 
You have to make yourself a priority. You have to make caring for yourself, wanting a better lifestyle, and wanting to become happier, healthier, and a better person, priorities in your life.

Others are not going to love you and respect you if you do not love yourself; so, you have to make it a mission to create a better lifestyle for yourself, and learn to make your happiness and well being a priority, no matter what changes you have to make, or what poor influences or friends you might have to remove from your past. Making it about you, and your happiness, is going to make the road to recovery a lot easier for you to handle.

These are some of the many things that will help you get clean, and will help you make the necessary changes to become sober. Of course rehab is a must in many situations, but with some, these minor lifestyle adjustments are also going to help them in their course to recovery.


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